Dry
by caseyedith
Summary: "Fine.  I'll agree to that."  An interesting wager leads to rather inebriated results...


**Dry**

_A Shinomori Aoshi Fanfiction_

"I have no tolerance for alcohol." – S.A.

* * *

"Misao-chan, where is Aoshi?"

Himura Kaoru found Misao in her room, getting ready for a night in the city. Sagara Sanosuke had finally returned from an extended escape to distant parts of the world a few days ago, and he wanted to treat all of his friends to a night out. He'd apparently done very well on his travels, and managed to make honest money. And it just so happened that Takani Megumi, and the newly engaged couple Shinomori Aoshi and Makimachi Misao, were staying in Tokyo. Sanosuke's timing couldn't have been better.

"He's reading, Kaoru-san! He'll be done in a minute, I already told him I was getting ready." With her ever-lively smile, Misao looked back in the mirror and finished adorning her shorn hair with a new comb. Kaoru smiled, always enlivened by Misao's infectious energy. Neither of them noticed Aoshi sneak up quietly behind her.

"Is that the comb I purchased for you, Misao?" Kaoru nearly jumped out of her skin, clutching her stomach, while Misao brightened at the sound of her fiancé's voice. "Yes! I love it!" She looked in the mirror again, to briefly admire the purple gemstones adorning the silver encrusted wooden comb. It matched her plum kimono for the night.

A tiny smile graced Aoshi's face, an extravagant display of emotion for the stoic onmitsu. Then he disappeared again, down the hall to meet Kenshin who was waiting to leave.

Kaoru had just collected herself again, and turned to face Aoshi. To her disbelief, he was already gone. And when she looked back at Misao, she was grinning brightly and turning off the lamp.

"How do you get used to him doing that?" Kaoru asked incredulously.

"Doing what?"

When Kaoru merely stared at her, Misao shrugged and passed her by, taking her hand in the process to lead her to the door. Kaoru made a sound like a small, shaky laugh and thought, _With all the excitement that's been going on around here lately, my baby must be constantly jostled in there… I hope nothing outrageous happens tonight…_ She stroked her still flat stomach, and thought about the new life growing there. Her second child with Kenshin…

* * *

"Well, if it isn't the two happiest couples on earth! And the miraculous Himura descendant look-alike!" Himura Kenji shrieked in delight and ran to his 'Uncle Sano', whom he already loved immensely, despite meeting him less than a week ago. This worried Kaoru a little bit, since Kenji developed a new skill for mischief with each passing day. And now that Sanosuke was back, and had earned his devotion within a few minutes of meeting him, she foresaw an exponential increase in that trait.

With surprising gentleness, Sano caught Kenji up and perched him on his shoulders. The little boy laughed, since that was his favorite place—he likewise liked sitting atop his father's shoulders. However, he'd declared Uncle Sano's height better and more to his liking.

Megumi apparently had arrived before anyone else. Kaoru and Misao noticed this at the same time, as well as Megumi-san's disguised (but evident to all observant females) warmth of expression directed towards Sano. They looked slyly at one another, and grinned conspiratorially.

Unbeknownst to them, Aoshi and Kenshin had observed it too—and they saw how Sanosuke had been speaking with Megumi as they approached. But they were by far more discreet about their observations of their friends' affections.

"Well, Akabeko's waiting. I can't wait to see Tae's face when I pay her back for all my mooching all those years! I'll bet she'll be so pleased, that she'll give me an unlimited tab for the rest of my life!"

"…Baka," Megumi retorted, despite her grin. Sano met her challenging glare with equal interest. "What was that?" he asked. Megumi shook her head and looked away. Kaoru's and Misao's excited smiles widened.

* * *

"BWA-HA-HA-HA!"

Sanosuke's raucous laughter was the entertainment and irritation of his companions. None more so than Megumi, who would give him dirty looks every few minutes. But he didn't notice.

Kenji was still awake, and imitating everything Uncle Sano and brother Yahiko did. Kaoru regretted the fact that his bedtime was already passed. But she sighed and smiled, knowing what a wonderful occasion this was. Finally, after they'd all be separated for five years, they were together again. It had been her wish that they would stay together, back when she was sixteen…

"Kenshin! Aoshi! Yahiko! Katsu! Let's drink up tonight! I wager twenty yen each that I can out-drink all of you! I'll be you've never had Russian vodka! Or German beer! Well I've drunk it all, and none of it has ever fazed me!" His cheeks were red with laughter.

"I'm in," Katsu said, looking less red-faced than his childhood friend, but just as spirited with the help of a little booze. "Alright!" Sano slapped him on the back. "You don't mind, do you Tae?" Sano had been most amused to discover that Katsu and Tae had met and fallen in love with one another during his travels. They were happily married now, and Katsu had taken up drawing again, making advertisements for the Akabeko. His newspaper also serviced them well.

Tae smiled, albeit a little uncertainly, in response.

"How 'bout it, Kenshin? Don't let Jo-chan dissuade you!" Kaoru leveled an irritated look at Sanosuke, because she knew he wasn't half as drunk as he was pretending to be. But she remained silent, not planning to involve herself with the situation. Kenshin glanced at her and then at Kenji. The three-year-old already had a cup in his hand, mimicking his uncle.

"I'll take that, Kenji. Let's do this, Sano. But only once. Son, make sure you pay attention, and understand that you aren't allowed to do this until you're old enough." Kenji nodded and obediently sat further forward in his seat. He didn't mind so much that he wouldn't be allowed to participate—he'd tasted sakē before, and didn't like it. But at least he'd get to watch!

"I'll do it too, Sano. But what about you, Aoshi-san? You don't drink do you?" Yahiko looked at Aoshi curiously. He had said little during their whole meal, while Misao talked nonstop beside him. And by the look on his face, he was not about to volunteer his participation.

"No, I don't drink," he said simply. Sano gave him a sidelong glance, mouth quirking with mischief.

"Shinomori! Lighten up, it's just one round! How about this? If you win, I'll pay one hundred yen, in addition to the twenty each! Sound good?"

Aoshi's face remained impassive. He also knew that Sano wasn't as drunk as he seemed, and that Takani-san had managed to slip a little powder into Sanosuke's bowl of soba, which he was still finishing. Whatever it was, he was certain Sanosuke's antics would soon be cut short.

So, he did something unexpected…

"Fine. I'll agree to that."

Shocked silence fell over the whole group. The only one seemingly unsurprised was Sano himself. He just smiled wider and roared with laughter. "The great Shinomori has finally learned how to party! Great work, weasel-girl!"

"Weasel-girl? What about me looks like a weasel to you anymore, chicken-head?"

"All of you. Now, where's a flask for Aoshi?"

"…Here…" Tae said with resignation. She placed another flask on the table, and then sat next to Kaoru. The women present, including Tsubame, watched their male companions warily…

With luck, the drug Megumi had given Sano would kick in momentarily. Aoshi made sure he took a bite of the soba, and then a few bites more. He took the flask of the destabilizing beverage and drew it closer, preparing himself for the start.

"Ready? Alright, bottoms up!" The sakē jugs all turned up at once at Sano's declaration. There was silence, and gulping from multiple directions.

Several moments passed. All eyes eventually went to Aoshi, since watching him drink was the most fascinating. He drank like a ninja—stealthily, and quickly, seeming to have some sort of strategy to his actions. And his cheeks were becoming pinker…

Finally, Kenshin gave up. He slammed his flask down and started laughing. "Alright, I'll pay! I'll never out-drink any of you, since I get so much less practice…" The women all chuckled appreciatively at his statement, which made his friends drink even more furiously that before. It was a thing among them, that no matter what Kenshin did, he always got the women's approval. Sano decided for everyone that it was because he was the closest to the women in stature, and hair length once upon a time… Not acknowledging the fact that Kenshin was also the most responsible and soft-spoken of them all.

Aoshi was beginning to wonder when the herb would kick in, and put this stupid contest to an end. He wondered why he'd done this… The others were giving up, after Kenshin. Finally, only he and Sano were still gulping.

In an ostentatious display, Aoshi let the jug distance itself from his lips, but the sakē still poured smoothly into his mouth. Everyone but Sano watched in amazement. It was like he'd practiced this…

A deep, throaty chuckle started in Aoshi's throat. It was just soft enough to not block his trachea and esophagus, allowing him to continue drinking. And it was just soft enough to make him sound completely deranged as well.

Suddenly, Sano's sakē flask came down, completely empty. Aoshi was still drinking, though, so for a moment no one was certain who'd won…

Aoshi's head was swimming with sakē. He had seen Sano's flask hit the table, but didn't think to stop drinking until every last drop of his was gone as well.

"HAH!" Aoshi barked, the moment he downed the last swallow. Everyone jumped at the uncharacteristically loud noise coming from him. His normally deep voice sounded exceptionally higher…

"It's a…tie! (hic!)"

"Well, now…" Sano said, grinning in a most self-satisfied manner. He knew he still hadn't reached his limit: far from it. He wasn't really sure he even had one when it came to sakē. He'd never had enough money before to reach it, he'd always reasoned.

But things were different now, and even better…a very interesting wager was taking place.

The Shinomori Aoshi Sano and all his friends had ever known, was changing before their very eyes.

"If it's a tie, then I think we need to go another round, and another, until there's a loser. What do you think, Aoshi? Or would you just like to call it?"

Aoshi wondered in the back of his mind when the stupid powder Megumi had slipped into Sano's bowl would work. Why was the scruffy fistfighter still talking so normally? But, the alcohol was already beginning to take over the rest of his consciousness, and so he agreed to the next round.

"Is…is it just me, Misao, or does Aoshi seem a little different to you too?" Kaoru whispered surreptitiously to her friend. Misao's fiancé was now swaying his head and his sakē bottle back and forth in different directions, and still getting every single drop into his open mouth. His cheeks were a full red now, and he was humming a familiar children's lullaby. All around him, his friends were watching and feeling a growing sense of dread…with a side of amusement.

Misao didn't know what to say… She had never seen Aoshi drink any alcohol…

"ENOUGH!" Aoshi suddenly bellowed, sharply turning the sakē jug upright and slamming it down so hard on the table that it cracked. Everyone jumped, including Sano, who's eyes were suddenly droopy.

"I win?" he asked in a hazy voice. Megumi put her face in her hand and grimaced, wondering what she had just done…

"No, I win!" Aoshi snarled, lunging forward and grabbing Sano by the collar of his black jacket. But once their faces were inches apart, he noticed how Sano could barely keep his eyes open, and found it unbelievably hilarious. The powder was working!

"Haha…Ahahaha…A-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!" So began Aoshi's manic laughter, rising in several decibles with each breath.

All of a sudden, he stopped laughing, and his face fell down, slapping the table top. Sano's head went down at the same time, and he began snoring loudly.

"Aoshi-sama!"

Misao shuffled towards her fiancé worriedly, and put a hand tentatively his back. Aoshi frightened her then by sitting bolt upright, and swaying absently from side to side. His eyes were unfocused, and a slap-happy smile was plastered on his face.

"Uncle Sanoooo…" Kenji was calling to his uncle, wondering why he was sleeping at the table. Meanwhile, Kenshin had one eye on that, and the other on Aoshi and Misao-dono. He then glanced toward Kaoru and the other women, watching rather apprehensively, though not without their smiles in spite of themselves.

"Maybe you should all get Misao-dono out of here," he suggested calmly, making meaningful eye-contact with his wife. Kaoru nodded, reached for Kenji, and then called softly to Misao.

"Uncle Sanooo! Uncle Sano…hehehehehehehe…" Aoshi was mimicking Kenji, and laughing creepily as well, while Misao watched him with an utterly horrified expression. This was not the man she had come to know and love!

"Misao-chan. Misao-chan, come on, we're all going home. Kenshin will take care of Aoshi…" Misao heard Kaoru's voice, and was half-glad for an excuse to get away. The other half of her didn't want to leave Aoshi in such a state.

"Misao! My darlinnnng, Misao! Don't go, sweetness!" Aoshi suddenly said, literally cooing his words and proceeding to lay his head against Misao's chest. She blushed furiously, and subsequently removed herself from contact with him. That was a first for everyone, as what came next.

"Shinomori Aoshi! I never want to see you like this again! Don't show your face to me until you're completely sober!" Misao commanded fiercely, before turning away to follow the other ladies out of the Akabeko. The men left behind, still conscious and in their right minds, all exchanged similar looks: 'what do we do now?'

"Misao…left me…" Aoshi said, in a near whisper, attracting all their attention again. He seemed near tears now, and his tall frame was slumped over itself.

A startlingly loud snore erupted from Sanosuke. But no one paid much attention.

Yahiko looked like he wanted to say something, but Kenshin shook his head wordlessly. He eyed Aoshi meaningfully, encouraging everyone to remain silent and just watch.

"I've got to go after her!" Aoshi loudly proclaimed, jumping up from his seat, and somehow landing feet first on the floor. He'd trampled the table, and on Sano's head in the process, but that was to be expected since he was clearly drunk out of his mind.

"Aoshi, wait!" Kenshin called, but it was far too late. The fleet-footed ninja was already gone from the restaurant.

* * *

"Misao, my darling! Wait, my darling!"

Aoshi was jubilant, seeing his women friends, and his lovely fiancé, all walking home together. Behind him, all the men except Sano were running after him, with Kenshin in the lead. Misao turned around, disbelief cast upon her face.

"Aoshi! I told you not to show me your-," She was silenced when Aoshi kissed her full on the mouth with lips tasting like sakē. But he broke the kiss quickly and began singing to her. She was beside herself with annoyance, disbelief, and anger, and yet couldn't find any words to express it all.

_A young girl blooms_

_ So short a while_

_ A young man hearkens_

_ To see her smile_

_ Dearly I love thee_

_ Sweetly I sing_

_ Won't you tell me you love me?_

_ And let our love take wing?_

Aoshi's ballad was quite a beautiful one, though sung in a slurring, drunken soprano completely unlike his usual voice. The contrast was bizarre and so _wrong_, that everyone in the vicinity didn't know whether to laugh, cry, or scream in terror. So they settled for a combination of all three. Misao cried, as Aoshi proceeded to sweep her off her feet and rock her back and forth like a newborn, Megumi let out a shrieking laugh, and the rest laughed softly, yet merrily.

After a few moments of crazy mirth, Kenshin lightly touched Aoshi's shoulder and said, "Put Misao-dono down now, Aoshi, it's time for us to go. I think we should let the girls all stay in the dojo tonight, while we sleep off the sakē at Akabeko's rooms upstairs. Come on now, we left Sano behind, and he'll be most displeased if he wakes up alone."

"Sanosuke! Sagara Sanosuke!" Aoshi said in a frenzy, almost dropping Misao on her head. She yelled again, but was mercifully caught by Megumi who said, "Don't worry about Sanosuke. He's learning his lesson as well—he won't wake up until tomorrow afternoon, if I calculated correctly."

Kenshin had a grim look of comprehension on his face. He turned to Tae. "Tae-dono, I hope you don't mind if we use your rooms?"

Tae did mind, but she knew there was nothing that could be done about it. It was very clear that if Aoshi and Misao were forced to stay in the same place tonight, their wedding might very well be off. And as an illustrious match-maker, she just couldn't allow that to happen!

"Please take care of everything, Kenshin-san. Don't let anyone make too much of a mess!" Kenshin nodded, and then steered Aoshi away from there. The taller man had seemingly spaced out, but with Kenshin's guided push, he seemed to come back again and cried out: "We need to take care of Sagara Sanosuke! Everybody be quiet! SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Kenshin rolled his eyes as Aoshi went running off in the direction of Akabeko again. This was going to be a long, long night…

* * *

"I can't believe him, Kaoru!"

The next morning, Misao was venting to her best friend while she braided her short hair the way she used to. She was dressing in her Oniwaban uniform to go see her hungover fiancé this morning, because it was easier to move in, and she was not inclined to dress up for anyone at the moment. Kaoru was calmly listening by the door, as she had the night before.

"Why on _earth_ would he decide to drink if he _knew_ that would happen to him? He KNEW! I am so angry with him that I could _strangle_ him—ARRRGHHH!" She let out a frustrated roar as she messily tied the end of the braid.

"There," she said in a tone of finality, raking her bangs out of her face once more. "Let's go. I want to be there when he wakes up so that I can get a head start on yelling at him! I am going to make him suffer for this until our wedding day!" And Kaoru couldn't find it in her to doubt Misao's word.

* * *

Aoshi wasn't anywhere to be found when Misao and Kaoru arrived at Akabeko. When Tae's father had allowed them into the men's rooms upstairs, they had immediately found Kenshin awake and reading the newspaper. Sanosuke, as predicted, was still soundly asleep, snoring sonorously. Katsu had left, quite sober, to be at home with his wife. Yahiko, also sober, had been present at the dojo to begin the day's training.

But Aoshi, Kenshin said, had slipped away in the night, after they had all fallen asleep.

"Himura, do you mean to tell me that you, the ex-Hitokiri Battosai, DIDN'T NOTICE HIM LEAVE?" Misao asked furiously. Kenshin tried to placate her calmly. "Misao-dono, this one must point out that your fiancé is also the ex-Okashira of the Oniwabanshu. Once he fell asleep, I expected him to stay that way. But I know where he might have gone…"

Misao bit out a frustrated apology, realizing that this was true. "But I know where he went," she said then, asking Kenshin, "Where's the nearest shrine?"

Kenshin and Kaoru smiled in spite of themselves, and Kaoru offered to show Misao the way.

* * *

"When I see him, I might have trouble _not_ causing a scene!" Misao vented, speed walking the last few steps to the temple. She bade Kaoru good-bye for the time being, saying she'd rather see Aoshi in private. Kaoru nodded and said she'd wait back at home.

Aoshi's broad back wasn't difficult to pick out from the scattered worshipers. Misao took a deep breath through the nose and strode purposefully to kneel beside him.

She said a quick prayer for strength and patience, and then nudged Aoshi in the ribcage.

"Aoshi!" she whispered. Aoshi glanced at her, abashed, and looked down again.

"Hullo, Misao," he said in a hoarse whisper. Misao took a closer look at him, and saw that he was haggard, his eyes were half-lidded, and he still looked very much hungover. But he seemed to be lucid.

"Let's go. The gods answered your prayers and sent me!" She got up and waited for him expectantly. Feeling apprehensive, Aoshi prayed: _You couldn't have been even just a bit kinder? Haven't I been through enough?_ But realizing that he had to face it, Aoshi resigned himself to following his petite punisher with deliberately shuffling steps.

"Aoshi: _What. Happened?_" Misao demanded, once they were safely out of the quiet temple. Aoshi looked her in the eyes and began.

"I drank," he said simply, taking a sniffled breath through his nose. His head felt awful…

Misao rolled her eyes, because that much was obvious. "Obviously," she said, and Aoshi winced. "Why'd you do it?"

"I didn't think I'd drink that much," he continued lamely. "Megumi put sleeping powder in Sanosuke's food. I didn't expect it to take so long to react. Yes, I knew that my limitations with alcohol were very shallow. I'm sorry, Misao, for embarrassing you." He let his bangs cover his eyes then, sealing his mouth in a grim line.

Misao sighed, shaking her head. "Come on," she said, all desire to tongue-whip him gone. As long as he was being honest with her… "You really need to rest more, Aoshi," she said, taking his hand in her own. "Get over the hangover…"

* * *

"I have one more question," Misao said later that day, when Aoshi finally woke up from his nap, and everyone was once again gathered in the Akabeko. Tae had made certain to lock up all the alcohol this time. "When did you first realize you were a crazy drunk?"

A giggle went around the whole table, although everyone but Misao tried to hide it. Aoshi glared at the table top, feeling more embarrassed than he had in a very long time…

"Can we discuss this in private, please, Misao? I'm not really interested in telling this story right now…"

"All right, why don't you and I just go upstairs for a few minutes? I gotta know!" she led him, unwillingly, away from their friends.

"Don't get carried away up there you two!" Sano called out after them, finally awake, but still drowsy. He chuckled. "Wedding's only a few weeks away…" He then winced, because Megumi's hand came to smack him smartly on the head.

"Ouch, woman, what are you doing?"

"You're being a prime idiot, I'm chastising you."

"Like that's any of your business…" Megumi simply smirked.

"So, I guess you reached your limit last night then, Sanosuke?" she asked, changing the subject to refer to his sakē intake. Sano rubbed his neck in thought.

"Nah, it can't be, I know I've drunk more than that before…" Realization finally dawned on him and he accused, "What'd you do to me, Foxy?" Megumi's eyes went wide.

"I? I didn't do anything!"

"You're lying to me, woman!" Sano ground his teeth and glared at her. He and Megumi continued to bicker incoherently until Misao and Aoshi returned.

"Get a grip, rooster-head, and leave Megumi-san alone," Misao said huffily, when she got the gist of their argument. "If it weren't for _you_, this probably wouldn't have happened last night!"

"Hey, now, Weasel, how can I be sure if I don't know what came over me? 'Fess up, kitsune!"

"Forget it, I owe you nothing…"

"QUIT IT WITH THE 'WEASEL'!"

"You know, Weasel-girl, I just gotta say that I'm surprised Aoshi hasn't gotten drunk before… But then again, you always act drunk enough for the two of you…" Sano then received a well-aimed demon bird kick of rage right in the face…

"I wish my master could be here to see this…" Kenshin said thoughtfully, to lighten the mood. Unfortunately, only Kaoru seemed to hear him, and she laughed.

"Oh, well," he said, shrugging, and continuing to watch the others bicker, "Even if he did, it's not like it'd persuade him to be dry…"

Beside him, Aoshi bowed his head, once again intent on prayer…

* * *

[A/n] Well, this is an idea I've had for a very long time now. It is the longest oneshot I've ever written, I believe. I hope it's a credit to the world of RK fanfic :). Thanks for reading! _caseyedith


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